SotTP 5: Girls Without Pants
by Luna x3
Summary: Last summer, Bridget, Lena, Carmen, and Tibby relearn the most important lesson of all: if you're ever apart when you can be together, you're not living life the way you should be. Now read on as the girls live it up without the Pants.
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

Once upon a time there were four beautiful, thin, charming girls who wanted nothing more than to stay together, when life was trying to pull them apart.

So they all prayed and wished that somehow, they would be able to stay together.

The answer to their problem was handed to them in a pair of pants.

Those girls were me and my friends (okay, so maybe we're all not beautiful, thin, and charming…especially not me). And the pants were a pair of blue jeans from a local thrift shop.

I know what you're thinking. Pants. Okay. Who cares about _pants_?

That's where you're wrong. They weren't just any pants. They were magical pants.

Believe me, if they fit amazon Bee, perfect Lena, slender Tibby, and me, well…Puerto Rican Carmen…then they _had_ to be magical. Seriously.

So the Pants were perfect. They kept us together, even when we were miles and miles away from eachother.

For a while.

Then the Pants started misbehave. And instead of keeping us together, they started to keep us apart.

Long story short, we don't have the Pants anymore. Hopefully for the better, and none for the worst.

Right now I think they're floating along some sea in Greece or something.

Anyway, the important thing is, the Pants taught us the most important lesson there is out there:

As long as you're apart, love will always keep you together.

And more importantly;

Get together again as fast as possible, and kick ass together. Just because you _can_ be apart doesn't mean you should be.

And so our story begins, as the girls without the Pants. 


	2. Chapter 1

**Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 5 : Girls without Pants**

Chapter One

_Hands are shaking cold  
These hands are meant to hold_  
-The All-American Rejects

Carmen sat sipping her iced latte from Dunkin Donuts, and thinking about love.

When you really got right down to it, she and the other girls were…. well…_bad_ when it came to love. They trampled through it, ran from it, rolled around in it until there was nothing left.

Bee, for example. Bee attacked love, confronting it in the face. She rampaged into it, dove in it, sunk herself so deep into it, that whenever love left her, even for a short while, she was left empty and broken.

Lena …Lena was funny about love. Since Kostos, she wasn't very much accepting of love. She kind of picked it at it like it was that plate of slimy green spinach that your mom slaps on your plate when you're a little kid. Pretending to take a bite here and there, but really uncomfortable about the whole mess.

Tibby…Tibby didn't know love. She welcomed it, sure, but it took a while to seep into her, to feel it inside of her. She was slow when it came to that.

And Carmen, herself…she was the psycho dog you meet when you're going for a walk. She was aggressive, she was mean. She sunk her teeth into it and than ripped it apart.

Even all the girls' friendships outside of their little circle were minimal, and meaningless…no emotions attached, really. As she stirred another packet of sugar into the coffee with one of those red stick things, she wondered what would have happened if their moms hadn't met at that awful class at Gilda's.

She tried to imagine them meeting eachother in kindergarten; Carmen would probably have been the bully, pushing kids over and growling at them. Bee would have been crazy; she would have been the kid who was caught climbing on the desks, or tasting the Elmer's glue. Tibby and Lena would be eerily similar; silent and nerdy, most likely to be found hiding in the closet or sitting by themselves.

Stuff like this made Carmen upset. Almost upset enough, she noted, to not finish her iced latte.

Well, maybe not _that_ upset.

Her cell phone buzzed from inside her pocket. She pushed it open, and grumpily said "Hello?"

"Carma?" It was Lenny. "I need you to come here. Now."

Carmen swallowed. "What's wrong?"

Lena's voice was practically hysterical. "I just need you."

"Say no more." Carmen clicked her phone closed, and grabbed her coffee. She only hoped she wouldn't break the speed limit getting to Lena's house.

**x x x**

Bridget was happy.

Not just smile happy, but the kind of happy where you feel like a ray of sunshine is following you around all day.

Of course, she was with Eric. Eric was the only one who could make her feel so happy. Other than her pals.

"Bee?"

And he became even more attractive as he walked into the room bearing a plate of steaming nachos and salsa.

He put the plate down on his mattress and allowed Bridget to give him a big fat thank you.

"Who needs salsa," she said as she kissed him all over his face, his ears, his neck. He ran his fingers through the Hair, his chin resting on top of her head.

And the moment was incredibly broken as Bee's cell ringer went off.

"Crap." She yanked the cell phone out of her pocket, irritably reading Carmen's name off the caller I.D.

"Carmen, this better be good," she grumbled into the phone. Eric's hand rested on her waist, so it wasn't _too_ bad.

"Bee, Lena called me. Something's wrong. Something big." Carmen's voice was several notes higher than usual.

Bee groaned. "Allright Carma. I'm on my way." She snapped her phone shut and gave Eric a look that she wished could represent all her disappointment and frustration all at once.

How many times would they be interrupted?

**x x x**

Tibby opened the door to a frazzled Carmen.

"Is she okay?"

Tibby's face was sad, but you could tell it was only an empathetic sadness. She felt bad for Lena, but only because she loved Lena.

"I don't even know yet. She hasn't said a word. Where's Bee?"

At that moment, Eric's car pulled up. Bee hopped out, blowing Eric a kiss before watching him drive away.

Almost silently, the girls walked upstairs, the air filled with tension. When they got to Lena's room, and saw Lena lying pathetically on the bed, her face pressed into the pillow. 

"Len-eeeee."

Bee jumped on the bed, wrapping her arms around Lena's neck. Lena gave a strangled sort of sound, and rolled over. Her face was puffy and red, her green eyes appearing almost blue.

"Lenny, what happened? We'll make it better. I promise."

Lena wiped her eyes on her blanket, and studied the faces all around her. They all loved her, and they all wanted to help her _so_ badly. But somehow, their kindness couldn't worm its way into her heart, and she felt as if they weren't there at all.

"Lenny."

Bee stood up, put her hands on Lena's face, and forced her to look up at her.

"Valia called."

A collective sigh of relief filled the room. At least she was talking.

"What did she say, Len?"

A fresh wave of tears spilled from Lena's eyes. Her face, which was the most beautiful face you could have ever seen, had taken a look of tragedy.

"Kostos…"

Tibby groaned. Kostos again. How many times would he break Lena's heart? Tibby could only imagine what Valia had told her this time; maybe he was having an affair with his cousin or something.

"Kostos…" 

Even Carmen, who was usually sympathetic towards the whole Lena-Kostos epic, was feeling a surge of annoyance. Did this guy ever stop? She had trusted Kostos after what had happened between him and Lena last summer, but only for Lena's sake. Now she wondered if she had been foolish to have done so.

Bee didn't care what the jerk did this time. She just wanted to make sure Lena was okay. She wanted to fix her.

Everyone was watching Lena, waiting to hear what she had to tell them. And finally Lena could feel their warmth, their love. She inhaled deeply, her breath coming out in sobs.

"Kostos is dead." 

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Hope you enjoyed Chapter One. Read and Review.


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

_When's it my turn?  
Wouldn't I love,_

_Love to explore that shore up above?  
Out of the sea  
Wish I could be  
Part of that world  
_- The Little Mermaid

Everyone in the room froze, except for Lena, who was still trying to hold back her sobs.

"Lenny…"

Bee sat right back down on the bed, putting an arm around her shoulders. Tibby stood stiffly with her hands in her pockets; she was uncomfortable about death related situations. Carmen sat on Lena's other side, her face full of sympathy and understanding, even though she didn't really understand at all.

"He was working on one of his Bapi's boats. He was supposed to be taking it out to test it."

She paused to take another breath. Carmen offered her a Kleenex.

"There was a problem with the boat, and it sunk, with Kostos on it. It was late, and nobody was around…he wasn't able to resurface by himself; they think he…hit his head or something. He…"

Another breath, another sob.

"He drowned."

"Oh, Lena."

Tibby finally came over, kneeling down on her knees next to the bed.

"Its just that…there's no more…"

Lena sank back into her bed, her head resting on her pillow.

"After last summer, I thought there was a chance that maybe one day…"

At that moment, Effie entered Lena's room, her face mirroring her sister's, on a lower level.

"Len…Valia called back. The funeral is the day after tomorrow."

Lena closed her eyes. She felt like she was lost. She felt like she was the one who was stuck in the ocean, unable to breathe. She was drowning in her own grief.

"We're flying to Greece tonight. Dad already made the arrangements. He told me to tell you to pack…"

Carmen interrupted.

"Are there any extra tickets available?"

Effie shook her head.

"No, not for you guys. I'm sorry. My mom wanted you all to come; she knows how much it would mean to Lena, but there was enough trouble getting the plane tickets for ourselves."

Carmen nodded. She turned back to Lena, whose eyes were still tightly closed. Bridget, however, wasn't satisfied. She folded her hands in her lap, giving Effie a sharp look.

"We'll be there. We'll find a way."

Lena sighed. None of the girls would ever understand. Kostos was the other half to her soul; the piece that completed her. He was what kept her breathing, kept her sane. And now he was gone.

Didn't they understand a piece of her had just died in Greece?

**x x x**

Bridget was busy making flight arrangements on her computer when her phone rang. She jumped a mile, but quickly recovered when she realized who it was.

"Hi, Eric." Her heart did the familiar skipping thing, and her voice bubbled over in happiness.

"Hey Bee. Plans for tomorrow?"

Bridget hated to kill the happiness in his voice.

"Oh…Eric, I'm sorry…you'd never believe it, but tomorrow I'm actually catching the next flight to Greece."

Eric laughed in a funny way. "Greece?"

"Lena's…" What was Kostos? Her friend? Her boyfriend? Was there a word for what he was?

Well, there was a word for Kostos, but Bee was never one to disrespect the dead.

"Its complicated. There was this boy that Lena fell in love with there…and he died."

There. That was sweet and simple.

"Oh." Eric didn't bother to mask his disappointment. Bee was doing that to him a lot, and it killed her. 

"Don't worry. The second I get back, I'll make sure we have a little welcome back party." Eric laughed. "Okay Bee. I'll be looking forward to it. Love you."

"Love you too." Bee hung up, feeling a little empty. She loved Lena with all her heart, but she loved Eric in a big way. When would she be able to show him how much he meant to her?

**x x x**

"Tibby?"

Tibby was sitting on her bedroom floor, sorting out clothing that she would take with her tomorrow. There was no doubt of whether or not Bee would be able to get the tickets. She knew that by now.

Tibby's mom stood in front of Tibby's doorway, questioning the many piles of pants, shirts, and socks that lay scattered on Tibby's carpet.

"Kostos died."

Her mom looked confused. "Kostos?"

Tibby sighed. Her mom was always forgetting things like that. "Lenny's ex. The one in Greece."

"Oh." She still looked confused. 

"I'm going to Greece with Bridget and Carmen tomorrow." Tibby zipped her duffle bag open, and threw in a pair of jeans. Underwear. Where was her underwear?

"Honey…maybe you should have asked first before just deciding to go,"

Tibby looked up at her mom. Oh, great. The whole I'm-your-mother-and-I-care-about-you deal again. How come it always reared its head whenever Tibby didn't want it to?

"Mom, Lena needs us. She's a mess." Bras? Did she have any clean bras?

Tibby's mom still looked uncomfortable. "Honey, maybe you're needed at home."

Now Tibby was angry. "Mom, I'm going, and that's it. Lena is _broken_. Should I just let her go through with that alone?"

Uncomfortable didn't even measure up to her mother's face now. "Well, yes, but isn't that what her family's for?"

Tibby stood up and looked her mother in the face. "I'm going. I'll be back either Friday or Saturday."

Her mother sighed. "Tibby…"

But Tibby refused to say another word about it, and continued to look for her bras. Where were they, anyway?

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	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

_Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?  
Answer: I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever_.

- Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss Universe contest

When Carmen is sleeping, she doesn't enjoy being woken up.

Especially before sunrise.

Especially when its her cell phone that's doing the waking.

Because Carmen was very likely to throw her cell phone against the wall in a moment of rash thinking, and then be out of a cell phone a few hours later when she woke up.

Luckily though, Carmen didn't throw her cell phone against the wall. She instead answered it and mumbled a very unfriendly hello into the speaker.

"Carma, our flight's at 6:30. So be ready and at my house at 5, okay?"

It was Bee's voice, and Carmen knew that, but she must have been dreaming.

"Carmen? You there?"

"Uhhh?"

"Did you hear what I said?" Her voice was getting impatient.

"Yeah, yeah. Flight at 6:30 tonight. I'll be there. Let me go back to sleep now, okay?"

She was on the verge of snapping the phone shut.

"Carma. The flight isn't tonight." Now she was a little more than a little impatient.

"Huh?"

"Its in two hours."

"Holy shit."

She sat up, fully awake.

"You'll be ready to go at 5?"

"Yeah."

She hung up, tossed the phone somewhere on the bed, and began to panic.

She didn't know where anything was here; all the furniture, all the rooms…she just couldn't wrap her mind around this place. It would take her much more than…how much time did she have? It was 4:15. 45 minutes to get ready.

Shower. She needed to shower.

And find her clothes. And pack.

All without waking her mom, David, and her baby brother, Ryan.

Right.

Okay. Breathe in, breathe out.

She went to her brand new dresser, pulling out one of the drawers. There was a pair of underwear. And also, a green sock. The next drawer had just a wrinkled blue polo shirt, and the next had a pair of old jeans.

Shit.

She slammed the drawer closed, and it caught on her finger. She yelled at the dresser, kicking it. Which of course made her scream more, because now she had an aching foot.

**x x x **

Even the beauty of Greece didn't sooth Lena's broken heart.

It really _was_ beautiful, like it always was. A crescent moon hung somberly in the sky, a shining beam of sadness in the sea of inky black.

If she had her paints with her, she would have captured it right then and there. It seemed to mirror how she felt. Just so dark, so lonely, so wanting to be able to cling on to any thread of hope that was handed to her.

Nobody understood what this was to her. They didn't know what he had said to her last summer. They didn't know about the tender possibilities that lay between them, needing proper nurturing and attention. After last summer, she had dared to believe that she and Kostos would be together again one day.

And now all hope was gone. She had allowed herself to climb up a dangerous mountain, knowing all the risk involved, and yet she was surprised when she lost her footing and fell hopeless to the earth.

Lena hated the idea of death; how final it was, how empty it was. She could have handled Kostos getting back together with his ex-wife. She could have handled him falling in love with another girl, or him falling out of love with Lena.

Because then she would still hang onto the foolish dreams of reuniting with him one day.

And now he couldn't.

Lena knew she would never truly love again. Kostos would always hold that spot in her heart.

She wouldn't be able to live knowing that he could not. She would not be able to get married and have kids, knowing that it was not him that she was married to, knowing that those were not his kids.

Life was what she had and what he didn't. And for him to live again, she would give up her life in a minute.

Because right now, life sucked.

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	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4  
****  
**_Let me guess, you picked out yet another colorful box with a crank that I'm expected to turn and turn until OOP! big shock, a jack pops out and you laugh and the kids laugh and the dog laughs and I die a little inside.  
- Stewie Griffin_

Bridget did a lot of thinking on the flight to Greece.

Her pals weren't the best of company; Carmen and Tibby had fallen asleep right away.

Bee was tired enough to join them, but she was too restless to actually close her eyes. So instead she sat there and let her thoughts wander freely.

She thought about Lena, of course. She loved Lena, and knowing how sad she was hurt her own heart. 

But Eric kept drifting to the very front of her thoughts, demanding to be noticed.

Bee's feelings for Eric were still complicated. She still loved him, of course, in that big and earth-moving way. Even now, after going out with him for a steady two years, her body reacted to him as if they were meeting for the first time; her cells sang at the site of him walking into a room, and when he kissed her…

When he kissed her, her cells would break into a full blown opera.

That first day in Baja, the first time she had seen him, what had her friend say?

"He is every kind of hot."

She said the words aloud, smiling at the memory. That had been a rough summer for her. It was hard to look back at who she had been, and even harder to remember the feeling of having her heart ripped out of her chest and throw across the floor.

But things were different now. She and Eric were finally together, finally expressing their love in the right ways.

Only now, Bee was afraid of keeping him.

Sure, she knew he loved her. He said it often enough. He _showed_ it often enough.

But Eric, still being 'every kind of hot', was hard to hang on to. Even walking down the street, holding hands with him, Bee couldn't help but notice the stares. It wasn't uncommon for a girl to stare at a hot guy; hadn't she done that in Baja? And besides, often enough, Eric had to deal with the whistles that were directed towards Bee (or at least, the Hair). 

But this was different. She knew she wasn't paying enough tribute to this every-kind-of-hot boyfriend. He deserved a hundred and fifty percent, and she wasn't living up to that.

Bee was mostly afraid of losing the guy she had pined over for so long, and having her heart broken again. The first time was bad enough; she wasn't sure if she could handle it again, especially if it was her own fault.

**x x x**

It was only two hours before the funeral.

Lena wasn't ready. She wasn't ready to see him.

In some stubborn part of her mind, she hoped that Kostos wasn't dead. That she'd look at the body that lay still in the coffin, and it wouldn't be Kostos in there. And then she'd find him, and be happy all over again.

She couldn't handle seeing a dead, left-over Kostos. That would be too final.

It would also make her cry some more, and her eyes were already so puffy, she could barely see out of them.

Maybe it was because she was in a funny mood that she suddenly had a strong yearning for the Pants. She longed for their protection, for the way they were soaked with all the love of her friends in its denim.

She also had worn the pants when she was with Kostos. The first time, and the last time.

"Lena?"

Effie was there, her hands clasped nervously together. They hadn't really spoken since yesterday, probably because Effie was afraid to say anything to Lena.

"Hey Ef. You okay?"

Effie snorted.

"That's a stupid thing to say. I should be the one asking you."

Lena laughed a little.

"I'm fine."

She snorted again.

"Fine would be you moping in the corner with your paints. Not you standing and crying in an empty room."

Lena shrugged.

"If I had my paints, I'd be moping over them, as you say."

"Lucky you"

Effie was carrying a wooden box in her left hand. It took a moment for Lena to recognize them.

"Oh, Eff, thank you."

She couldn't think of a time where she needed her paints more.

"You're not going to go paint with them now though, are you?"

Lena shrugged. 

"I am."

"But Len, the funeral is in like…a little while."

Effie gave her a weird look.

"You…_are _going to the funeral, aren't you?" 

"Don't worry, Eff. Everything's gonna work out."

Her sister put a kind hand on her shoulder, her eyes showing her sadness for her.

"I say the same for you, Lena." 


	6. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

_It's dreadful, it is, to have a house fall on you__but accidents will happen._

_- Glinda [Wicked_

Tibby decided, after getting off the plane with wobbling legs, that she actually would have rather stayed home like her mom had insisted.

Greece was _nice_, but she hated the empty feeling of being so far from home. At least when she was at school, she was only a few hours away. Now, she was _time zones_ away.

It was funny, but she actually longed to play a raring game of Candy Land with Nicky and Katherine, her younger brother and sister. She didn't even care if they cheated.

Greece was hot, and sticky. The air felt as if you could grab at it with your hands; or maybe if you breathed hard enough, you could choke on it.

Tibby notoriously hated hot weather. She preferred to be shelled up in her air conditioned bedroom, wearing nothing but a camisole and biker shorts, in the dead of the winter. Feeling so much heat on her skin put her in a bad mood.

Bee, of course, was living it up. Even though they were there to mourn the death (the death of an asshole, in Tibby's opinion, but nevermind that), Bee was practically doing cartwheels on the dried up ground. Carmen didn't even seem to mind it too much; sure, she looked cranky, but she always looked a little cranky. Tibby knew it wasn't the heat that was making her cross her arms and pout her lips like that.

Whatever. So what if Tibby wasn't ready to run a marathon with the sun beating down her back? She was tired, and she was hungry…she hadn't even preformed her new routine of having a coffee when she woke up this morning, and that was enough to ruin her entire week.

"Seriously, after the funeral, we are so taking Lena to the beach. Wouldn't you just _love_ to go swimming here again? Its so beautiful here. I wish I lived here."

Bee, as usual, was going a mile a minute. Leave it to her to make post-funeral beach plans.

Carmen's sour mood seeped into the air.

"No, because then I'll start to remember _why_ we were here last summer, and honestly, I'm not in the mood for that right now."

Bee punched Carmen playfully in the shoulder.

"Carma-sita, we're over that. Done. Moved on. Finito."

"Carm's right, Bee. Haven't you missed the Pants at all?"

Bee gave Tibby a look that told her that Bee had missed the Pants, a lot, but would rather pretend to be over them then sit and want them.

"The Pants have moved on, Tibbs. Sure, I miss them,"

She brought her hand to her forehead, putting on a dramatic face.

"But mostly because they were the only jeans I ever had that really gave me an ass, and made my legs look less flamingo-like."

She winked at Carmen, who actually smiled a little.

"Ahem. Actually, their job was to make _my _ ass look _small_, Bridg-eet."

Tibby shook her head. Her mood was too sour to joke around with them.

"They were there when I needed them, and they were important in that way."

"Aw, C'mon Tibbs. You know we miss them just as much as you do."

Tibby scowled. She hated how light Bridget was making the pants situation. The Pants had been a part of her; like a second pair of skin on her legs. They helped her find herself. They dared her.

They also reminded her of an old friend (Bailey) who she had lost. And more recently, an old _boy_friend.

Thinking about Brian brought back the pain, and the all-too-familiar tears beneath her eyelids.

Brian, the boy she had been deeply, immovably in love with. Brian, the most worth-while guy that existed on the face of the earth, if not the universe.

Brian, the guy that had dumped her, just a few months ago.

**x x x**

Lena thought painting would make her feel better.

It had actually made things worse.

She stood in front of her easel, paintbrush in hand, a small glob of paint dripping slowly of the fine bristles.

Lena had been overflowing with emotions – some she didn't even recognize. She thought painting would be easy. She thought her brush would work itself, practically, dancing on her pallet and then flying across the blank paper.

Sadly, her paintbrush didn't dance. It merely sat in her clenched fist, the wooden handle absorbing the sweat on her clammy palms, questioning her.

_What do you want?_ It murmured in paintbrush language. _You're the artist. You make your move._

And then the paintbrush had Effie's voice.

_Len, you are going to the funeral, aren't you?_

This thought hadn't crossed Lena's mind. Her body had been on automatic; of course she was going. It was her duty. Her responsibility.

Not go? Not even an option.

But standing there with her dripping paintbrush made her think a little more than usual.

Lena would hate Kostos' funeral. A bunch of unfamiliar Greek faces, dressed in black, saying things about Kostos that didn't fit him very well. Stuff about how he was a fine young man, a gentlemen, a hero with a kind heart.

Sure, Kostos was all that. But there were no words to describe his beauty, his greatness. It sounded corny, Lena knew, but it was true.

What would Lena say about Kostos?

She would tell everybody about how he stole her heart. About how he saw her naked that one time. About how much she had been willing to let him bend her, about how his honesty burned her but also had helped her.

Lena couldn't march in and say that in front of all the little old Greek ladies. They might faint at the thought of Kostos seeing her naked, god forbid.

And then Lena had an idea.

Kostos deserved a proper funeral, didn't he? A good one. One from Lena, the girl he had cursed with his never ending love. Lena might even be able to get over him then, and move on, knowing that she had given him that one last payment of respect. 

And then the paintbrush began to dance.


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

_Don't cry because its over. Smile because it happened.  
-Dr Seuss_

Bridget hated funerals. Everyone was so gloomy. And everyone wore black.

She hated it. She loathed it. She despised it.

A psychologist would tell her it was because she associated all funerals with her mom's funeral.

Fair enough.

Amongst the horde of ancient Greek women, Bee recognized Lena's grandma, Valia. Funny. She hadn't seen Lena yet today.

"Say, Carms, where's Lenny?"

Carmen shrugged, picking at a thread on her blouse.

"Dunno. She's probably over there somewhere."

She pointed in a random direction. Bee scowled.

"No, I haven't seen her. We'd pretty much notice Lena. She stands out in a crowd."

Tibby snorted.

"Especially in a crowd of gnomes. Did Kostos seriously only know a bunch of cranky old people?"

It was true. Other than a few exceptions, Bee and her friends were the only young people around. Lena had said that Kostos was a star grandson, but this was going a little too far. 

Ah, there was Effie. Bee cupped her hands around her mouth and called out her name, ignoring the annoyed stares.

"Hey Bridget, Carmen, Tibby."

She smiled politely at them. Her eyes weren't so puffy today, Bee noted.

"Eff, where's Lena?"

She shrugged.

"I'm guessing she's where she needs to be. I mean, at first I thought she'd definitely be here, because she mourns him oh-so-much, but I dunno. Maybe she just isn't ready for a funeral. Or never will be. But I do know that she…"

Bee cut her off, her voice rising in frustration.

"You mean she's not coming, and you _knew_?"

Effie shrugged again.

"Like I said, she needs to mourn him, whether he's a jerk or not. But Lena's a funny person, and she's probably mourning in a funny way." 

Carmen's mouth opened and closed, and Tibby's eyes narrowed in the sudden realization of what was going on.

"Wait. So we're here. At Kostos' funeral. The same Kostos that broke Lena's heart. And the only reason we're here decides not to show up?"

Another shrug from Effie.

"Right. Okay. We flew to Greece for _this_?"

Bee placed a hand on Tibby's shoulder, but she shrugged it off. Oy. Tibby was preparing to be a brat, and Bee didn't want to handle that right now.

At least it wasn't Carmen; with Carmen, being bratty usually got messy.

"Calm down. You know it's not like that. Lena still needs us here."

Tibby scowled.

"Well, I'm not staying."

Bee glanced at Carmen, who was surprisingly quiet throughout all of this. Carmen gave her a look, as if to say _Whatever, I'm not gonna argue, I'm not in the mood_, before crossing her arms and sighing huffily. 

"Effie, where's Lena?"

Effie looked annoyed now.

"I don't know. Somewhere. I'm not her baby sitter."

Then she stalked off to stand by her mother and father.

Bee suddenly realized how glad she was not to have a little sister.

-x-

The little olive grove was the same as she remembered; a perfect image of the perfect place in her memory. The little baby olives still clung to the blue-green leaves, and the water was still peaceful, still cool and clear and beautiful.

Lena had painted the grove once before; the summer she first met Kostos, a few years ago. How different she had been then; how differently she viewed the world now. When she came to Greece that summer, she never imagined that she'd meet a guy that would turn her whole world upside down. And if she hadn't met Kostos, she probably never would have known what it truly meant to love someone.

Thinking about that summer, about the first time she found this little grove…

She felt her cheeks turn warm as she remembered. Even now, so long after!

"Can you hear me, Kostos?"

Her voice sounded strange. _This_ was strange.

It was hot; hot enough to use it as an excuse.

Lena pulled her hair out of its clip, letting it fall past her shoulders. She peeled off her blouse first, then stepped out of her skirt.

_All the way.  
_

Now her bra, her underwear. Gone. She giggled. _  
_

"Can you see me, Kostos?"

Again, her voice sounded strange; bigger, louder, older. Stranger.

She pushed past the sweeping leaves of the olive tree, stepping into the glimmering water. It invited her; it kissed her skin, hugged her body.

She took a deep breath, sinking lower. The water was perfect; cool enough to be comforting in the hot sun, as soothing as putting on another layer of skin.

Lena felt that somehow, somewhere, Kostos' spirit was watching her.

She hoped that he was next to her.

She closed her eyes, imagining him there. The straying strands of her hair weren't really moving because of the wind, but because his fingers combed through it. The breeze on her face was really his breath, caressing her cheek.

"Oh, Kostos,"

_If only, if only, if only_.

Lena sighed.


End file.
